


Empty Eyes

by androgynousclintbarton



Series: Age Swap Au [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Age Swap AU, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-25 06:14:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30084708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/androgynousclintbarton/pseuds/androgynousclintbarton
Summary: Kakashi finds himself in his usual spot at the end of a long day, staring up at a stone face that will never look back at him.
Series: Age Swap Au [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2212908
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	Empty Eyes

Empty eyes.

The same emotionless, stone eyes that always stared back at him. No matter what day it was, or what he had managed to accomplish. They never changed.

How could they? They were just stone.

There was no person behind those eyes. No father to say ‘I love you’ or ‘I’m proud of you’ whenever he whispered his accomplishments and struggles to the giant stone face. Not that he would anyways.

How could someone claim to love him, when they had condemned him to live a life of loneliness and hatred?

“You’re sulking,” Glancing up, he stared at Gai. Hunched over top of him so that his usual bowl cut was hanging down in front of his eyes. “Why do you always come up here, Rival? It only ever make’s you sad.”

“It’s not like I have anywhere else to be,” Gai’s usual smile dimmed, and Kakashi could already hear the next words about to leave his mouth. He had said them so often that they were cemented in his brain, never to be forgotten. “I know, Gai. I always have a place at your house. My point still stands.”

It was his house or Gai’s. No where else in the village was he allowed unless he was being led to the Hokage’s office for his monthly allowance, or held back by Shino-sensei after class to enjoy a nice cup of tea before heading back home.

Back to empty rooms and endless quiet.

“Then what is it about this spot, hmmm?” Moving to Kakashi’s side, Gai took a seat on the roof beside him and staired up at Hokage mountain. Examining the four stone carvings looming over the village. “Why do you always look up there?”

_Where else can I see him?_

The question is left lingering in his mind. He knows that the memorial stone has the fourths name engraved on it, but if someone caught him standing there it would raise more questions. After all, he had no one to mourn for. No one to miss or cry over.

What right did he have to be in the grave yard where so many other people spent their days missing the people they had loved and lost? He would just be yelled out of there just like everywhere else he tried to go. At least here no one asked questions.

No one paid him any attention, except for Gai. He didn’t have to feel angry eyes on his back, or listen to whispered curses and insults. There was no talk about ‘the monster’ when he was sitting up here alone looking up at those large empty eyes.

“Sometimes I just want to be alone,” he answered, looking over at Gai as soon as he realized what he had said. “I-I don’t want you to leave though.”

Gai was different. He had always been nice to Kakashi even when adults and other kids told him not to be. Never being one to follow what others said, he made time for Kakashi and always tried to include him in everything that he did.

He was easily Kakashi’s only friend.

“Did you come to tell him about your new team?” Gai asked, smiling when Kakashi rolled his eyes. “Come on, I think he’d want to hear about them.”

“He’s a stone face, Gai. He’s not hearing anything I’m telling him.” and yet, here he was every day. Filling the old man in on his day. Acting like it was the fourth Hokage he was talking to. His father, or at least the man he thought was his father. He never got a straight answer to that question when he asked Tsunade-sama. She always just brushed him off and told him not to worry so much about the past.

But how could it be anyone else? No one else had that bright silver hair he saw in the picture hanging on the wall whenever he went to the Hokage’s office, or those sunken eyes that stared back at him with no emotion.

It was clear as day who the fourth was. The problem was no one was willing to confirm his gut feelings for him so that’s all they were at the end of the day. A gut feeling that led him to sit here talking to a stone face engraved into the mountain side.

“Well,” Gai bumped shoulders with him, laughing when Kakashi glared at him in response. “How about you tell me. If he really is listening, he’ll hear.”

It’s stupid. A waste of his time when he could be focused on training, or doing something relaxing. He doesn’t understand why Gai would even suggest such an idea.

Yet he finds himself going with it anyways. Complaining to Gai about the team he had been placed on. Telling him all about his Sensei’s emotionless eye and carefree attitude. Groaning whenever he has to remember that he’s on a team with Obito Uchiha of all people. The perpetually late, lazy shinobi that he couldn’t stand.

At one point he wonders why he couldn’t have been placed on a team with Gai. Then at least he would have one friend by his side, rather than another kid who hates him.

Then of course, that would be too much kindness. Tsunade-sama putting him on a team with his only friend? The only person who had ever decided he was more than just the rumors adults passed around between each other? Who never looked at him with fear or hatred?

No, it makes sense why he wasn’t put on a team with Gai.

If he was, he’d have at least something in his life to be happy about, and that just wasn’t allowed. So this was all he had. These quiet moments sitting on top of the Sushi shop with his best friend by his side, complaining about everything else in his life and praying that the day never came when Gai looked at him with those same hateful eyes.


End file.
